Life with children can be particularly hard on spouses. When the kids aren’t listening and there is so much to do, but you are sleep deprived tempers can flare. So how do you stay happy for the rest of your life?
According to Jimmy Soul you need to make an ugly woman your wife. In all seriousness though, marriage with children is difficult but modeling solid, loving relationships is one of the most important things you can do for your children. I always knew that my kids would model my behavior, but I had no idea how that modeling would affect me. They are like little mirrors showing us everything about ourselves, even the flaws.
When it comes to how my boys are going to treat people, think it is acceptable to be treated, know how to give and receive love; I can’t compromise. Nothing is more important than showing them the best way so that they can have wonderful, loving relationships. That means I have to be more selfless, let the petty things go, and stop getting upset about stuff that doesn’t matter: because most of it doesn’t matter.
In an article which appeared in the Huffington Post, Christine Carter, PhD wrote about the top three things parents need to do to raise happy children:
- Show them love and affection
- Manage stress effectively
- Model healthy relationships skills – particularly with your children’s other parent regardless of whether or not you are romantically involved.
In order to model a healthy marriage for your children, you need to keep your marriage strong. This means making your spouse a priority:
- Going on a date together
- Talking to each other about things that you value
- Being affectionate with each other
Working outside the home you have very little time for anyone, let alone yourself. This advice probably seems like another thing to add to your long list of to dos. Trust me, I get it! But it is one of the most important things you can do for your kids. I know I need to remember this, because sometimes it is easy to put off the very person that you know will understand. Instead, they need to be nurtured so that your relationship flourishes and your children see, reap and model the benefits.
Peace, Love & the Important Stuff,