To Shield or not to Shield…

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Growing up I was a very happy child until around High School.  Then the world did something strange to me.  See I was raised by a, how can I say this? Ok, she didn’t take no crap Mom (I really thought about using the s word because it would make this post sound HARD but I didn’t want to get in trouble).

She was adamant about me making something of myself, to be successful and go to college yada, yada, yada.  She was so serious about this she wouldn’t even allow me to take Home Economics or Parenting classes because she said “that’s not what my life would look like”, I was going to be a scholar.  I tried.  Really I did.  Once I finally broke free from this “Shield” mom had around me, I starting paying close attention to the world around me.  It wasn’t that pretty at times. Actually it was quite scary & sad.

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When I became a parent, back in um you know, well what year is it again?  *Sigh* Nevermind.  When I became a parent, I remember making sure as I was parenting not to place all of my beliefs on my children.  I wanted to make sure they were able to grow up and make decisions for themselves and in essence create their own Brand & Beliefs. And you know what, they did just that.  Introducing J-Swagg & L Boogie.  Yes they gave themselves rap names. I’m still waiting on the contract & the check.  Moving along…

A few years ago, I suddenly began noticing a change in my Peanuts as well.  Who they hung out with, what they did in their spare time & what they wore.  Kids always gravitate to what they know and what makes them feel safe.  From time to time you will see them venture out but they end up finding their way back to a safe & secure place.

Today, Peanut 2 looks at me and says “Mom, you know there is a lot going on in this world and truly, I don’t know what to feel”.  STOP, start over from where I said “Today”.  Yes read that again.  Peanut 2 is struggling with how she feels about this world and what she is witnessing with her own eyes.  Now, as a mom, I struggled with what to say.  Do I SHIELD her and tell her everything is going to be alright or do I take the time and have that conversation AGAIN, but this time she will probably do what I did, say 25 years ago, become angry.

Mommy blog question

So I ask my Mommywurk followers, how do you decide when to shield your children from the reality that we are living today?  Do you choose to shield them only from Explicit Lyrics?  Do you choose to shield them from Feminism?  Do you choose to shield them from violence?  Or do you just choose to turn a blind eye and let them figure it out on their own?

I think it’s time we take the Shields off and talk to our kids.  Teach them how to love, be compassionate, how to forgive and be understanding.  Simply for Humanity or just because you give a damn.

Stop, Drop & remove the Shield

Dee

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3 thoughts on “To Shield or not to Shield…

  1. Alexis says:

    Hi Dee! Great post! I believe it is our job as parents to raise our children to become productive citizens. As Christians, it is my husband’s and my goal to raise Godly men. In doing so, there are times when we have to allow them to experience life. It is often said that experience is the best teacher. Of course, we should shield them from danger, but some things they should be exposed to (under our guidance) so they can learn how to deal with them when we are not around. Eventually they will be on their own and making their own decisions. All we can do is do our best to make sure they are prepared. Life itself will teach them the rest. Here’s to letting go…just a little bit. 🙂

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  2. Charlie Mac says:

    Hey Dee,
    The things that you are talking about are the things that each and every generation has and will go through. The only difference now is the rate/speed of which they get the exposure to the real world. So shielding them from the world is not only right,it’s needed. Take what you have learned/experienced and apply it to now, don’t discount the value of your life experiences. Yes,talk to them,so they know that what they are going through is no different from what you went through too,also instead of looking at it as shielding,look at it as guiding and filtering. Their young hearts and minds are not prepared for the amount and speed of the exposure that they getting. Keep it real and continuity encourage,push,and love them

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