I have a little tear forming in my eye. I am watching Baby C2 poke his brother while I read to him. At dinner they were laughing and sharing little jokes with each other. This is what I wanted for H, for our family. However, this marks the end of the infant stage and almost the end of the baby stage and that makes my heart just hurt so much.
It started a few weeks ago. Baby C2 was much more alert than normal. I noticed he didn’t want to breast feed because he wanted to participate in the world. He poked his head out from underneath my nursing blanket and when I put him back under he clamped down on my nipple. “Don’t bite Mommy,” I found myself saying.
It isn’t just his interest in the world either. He is spunky. The cutting up with his brother is just half of it. He has been rolling around, army crawling and not staying put. Gone is my laid back infant. Instead he makes scream noises when he drops a toy he wants back and he mimics the sounds H makes. He is becoming his own person. It is hysterical and awesome and… sad.
It makes me want another baby. It makes me want to stop time. I can’t wait to see who he is going to be, but I want to capture this part of him so that I can hold it forever. My surprise baby is no longer a baby baby, and he will probably be my last baby. That part makes me want to cry.
Peace, Love and Hold On Baby!